McDonnell Place

I always knew this day would come. When I would have to choose.

I've worn aqua-tinted contacts over my pale green eyes for nearly 12 years.

You can keep the color, or trade it out for better vision and moister eyes, he said.

You can stay superficial and blind, or get real and- be healed- is what I heard.

We had come straight from swim class to the eye care office. I had three wet children sprinkling rice cake crumbs around the room, there wasn't time to deliberate. It was vanity or vision. The choice was that simple.

I knew what the right answer was, but still... my fake blue eyes! My DEEP, FAKE BLUE EYES! How I would miss them! They were the only contrast to the rest of my whiteness.

But I'm stubborn. I'm stubborn, gosh darnit, and that adds fervor to my moral compass. So I forced out the answer better vision, and swallowed the lump in my throat with an audible gulp.

And here I am. Casper, once again. Not much difference in black and white or color. Gone are my artificial Alice Blue's, gone is my contrast. Boo hoo!

That was over a week ago but still, something looks "off" when I brush my teeth in the morning. A little dull, a little flat, a little washed out. Maybe I should write a letter.

Then there was shock #2 of the day at the office. When it was discovered that I am not slightly, but majorly asymmetrical. And so- whatever, who cares- right? But it was more that I had no idea! That was the shock. You would think a person would know this about herself.

When I was fitted for my glasses I asked if they looked crooked. She said, "oh that's just your face."

Seriously.

My left eye is- apparently- further away from my nose than my right eye. One eyebrow is lower than the other. One EAR is lower. How very ODD. I always knew my jaw and bite was asymmetrical, but obviously the problems don't end there.

These are my old glasses, do you SEE how crooked they are? How MUCH lower one ear IS? We're talking plastic-surgery-low, people.

I told her this about these old glasses, I said, "NO WONDER one of my ears always hurt when I wore them!"

She nodded like it was a real shame, as if she understood the gravity of the situation.

These are my new glasses. Hm. Is it just me or am I looking whiter every picture?

Now, I know what you're going to say... oh please, there's not much difference, you would never know these things at a glance, and look how nice you look. But you're only saying that because I'm wearing makeup in these pictures. Most of the time I look like this:

And when a four year old is styling your hair and choosing your wardrobe, having deep blue eyes is not just important, it is essential in order to keep confidence.

But enough about my self-absorbed thought life. Let me show you who really makes glasses look good: