We were in Ocala for a week and I'm still trying to get things back in gear from that trip, so it's been a while since I've updated.

I went to my first Bible study of Beth Moore's "Breaking Free" last night and talked with my friend Kim until midnight afterwards--thus, I'm doing well just to be up and functioning. I'd already done Beth's "Believing God" a couple of months ago and loved it, yet this study seems to have even more Scriptural depth for me, and so I'm loving it even more maybe.

Two of my favorite things she wrote in this week's lesson:

" Part of God's consistent character is wooing the captive to freedom." (see Isaiah 61:1-4)

and

"I believe God's hatred of pride expresses His love. Pride slights Him but it destroys us."
(see 2 Chronicles 26: 21-23 and Proverbs 8: 13.)

If you've never had a Beth Moore class, I strongly, strongly recommend them. They are so rewarding--such an indescribable blessing, at least to me. I was telling my friend Kim that her studies make me feel as if God is stripping me of my prideful heart and hanging it on the blackboard to say, "now just study this for a minute here."

It sounds aggressive described that way, but it brings such freedom, such a sigh of relief for Him to take on my burden, my Albatross.

I picture Evan in the deep hallways of my imagination, and I put him on a cross and see him beaten beyond human recognition, as Scripture says. In all his baby-innocence, I picture him there, taking on every sin ever committed so that God has to turn His face from him...has to forsake my tiny, pure baby!! It's enough send me to bed for a month! But here's the catch: Evan is sinful--born under a curse--but Jesus, (born under the same curse,) was sinless--perfect.

I look at Evan's youthful innocence and it's nothing in light of a lifetime of perfection lived by God's only son! I can't imagine the agony that put Him there--I can't imagine turning my face on my son and choosing for him to take on other people's sins--wretched, wretched sins of all kinds! But I did that to my Creator, the Lover of my soul. It is because of me that He chose to forsake His Son. It's for me. I can't even comprehend Him doing that for me; to atone for my sins. I can't comprehend my direct responsibility in his crucifixion, nor the burden He took upon Himself!

(see Isaiah 53)

As Beth often marvels, "Praise Him!"

Praise Him.


So I didn't mean to get into a sermon...as you can tell, I was just really touched last night.
On a lighter note...a kid update:

Madalyn (71/2 months) ~

Madalyn is a dancer. When we took her to Chuck E Cheese she was totally jamming in her highchair. Her belly keeps the rhythm and rocks the rest of her body to the beat, so that her head bobs up and down with each jerky motion. It is truly the funniest thing! Every time she hears music she starts up--even music on commercials.

She's also pulling-up a lot now. Stands in her bed constantly and tries to pull-up on me when I'm changing Evan's diaper on the floor next to her, which can make it hard to change the diaper.

She's developed an obssession with Evan's play-stroller. I couldn't figure out why she was trying to leap out of my arms and off of my hip and then saw she was reaching for it, where it was in the corner of our kitchen. So I held her down so she could hold the handles, her feet kicking several inches above the ground, and she was absolutely thrilled. I walked around like this, with her pushing/steering the stroller until my back couldn't take any more, and even then I couldn't get her to let go--she was holding it up off the ground and I had to pry her fingers away! Now whenever she sees it she tries to jump out of your arms to get to it. I think she just want to be like big brother.

Finger foods delight her, refuses anything pureed, and will not eat fruits or vegetables. What is it with my kids and eating?! I refuse to force anything this time, though, because I've learned that only makes it worse. She LOVES pizza and grilled cheese and will eat pasta and meat and Cheerios--those sorts of things. That's more than her brother, so who can complain? Still loves her bottle, as well...I love it, too, because she's so busy it's the only time I get to cuddle with her!

Big Brother (29 1/2 months) ~

Just when I thought Evan couldn't be more infatuated with his beloved "Doggy" he goes and surprises me more. He now likes to sit on our bathroom floor with hair gel, a brush and the water bottle and says "Here's some gel, Doggy. Now water...it's just water, it's okay, Doggy." Then he brushes some, then "Oh, you look so nice Doggy!" Then he runs to me..."Doggy looks so nice!" You can be sure I respond with the appropriate praise! He also like to give his teeny-tiny stuffed duck and kitty-cat a bath in a big tupperware tub. He opens the doors to the secretary's desk in our foyer and uses it as their house. He also tucks them into bed in a basket, tells me they're sleeping and says "I'll see you in the morning, Duck. I love you, Duck." I can't help but be jealous of his stuffed animals! I wish he'd say these things to me!! He also says prayers with them sometimes. I love watching his imagination at work!!

He just climbed up on the couch by me and leaned his head on my chest for a big hug and I'm melting.

I also love hearing his word-choice for things. It's amazing to hear his vocabulary expand by his word-choice. Shaun gave him a shower this morning and he was whining while getting his hair washed and he started saying "About done...we're about done!" I thought that was funny, instead of the usual "All done."

I don't mean to ever give the impression I think my kids are perfect. I was thinking about how we probably praise them too much and don't remind them enough where every good thing they do comes from. Even their gifts they must credit Him with...there's so much to teach, and yet I'm still such a student myself!!

A not-so-perfect story...

Evan put a purple crayon in the dishwasher before we left town, so I came back to purple dishes. I didn't even know what it was until Shaun found the other half of the crayon. I had to throw over half of Madalyn's bottles away! At least we use the cheap kind now :). He's also been very whiny lately, and we've learned the harm in giving him second chances. I once read that "If referees gave second chances in sports, the game would be a free-for-all, and it's the same thing with parenting." I thought that was super-insightful and we need to be better about acting immediately, even though it's challenging when our hands are already busy with somethings else, and we have to just drop it and respond. My sole prayer for my kids is that they love God from a young age and enjoy Him whole-heartedly all the days of their lives. What more could we ask or want?

In His Grace,
Katie