Madalyn finds a snail on the way out the door this morning as she has a habit of doing. She brings it into the car with her, which is fine, so long as she promises not to leave him IN the car... to rot and die and SMELL:

"Look! Look at my snail... he's eating a worm. No. No, I think that's poop. I think my snail is pooping."

"I think he's eating the poop," says Evan.

"Eeeew," says Madalyn.

"Eeeew," says Jack.

"What does it taste like?" asks Madalyn.

"I tasted pee pee once," Evan says all too proudly.

"What! When?" I ask.

"I pee-pee'ed into a bucket of water in the shower once, and I drank it. I spit it out. It was gross!"

"Well, YEAH!" I said, beginning to question his intelligence level for the first time. "Why on EARTH would you want to drink pee pee, that's SO gross, Evan!"

"Because I wanted to know what it would taste like."

"Look at my snail!" squeals Madalyn.

(Snail is stretching it's neck high and having a look around the car.)

"It's trying to bite you," says Evan.

"No he's not. He's trying to kiss me," says Madalyn, smiling.

(We are arriving at school now- Madalyn announces she wants ME to hold her snail.)

"Mommy doesn't want to hold your snail, I'll get you out and you can go put him in the grass over there by the building... in the flowers... he'll like that."

"But he might get lost!" Evan says.

"Oh, well I think he IS lost. He's a LONG way from home now," I point out.

"Well he might be sad," says Evan.

"Yeah, he might be sad," says Madalyn.

"He'll make new friends," I say, while she runs over to the wet white flowers in her teal Ariel nightgown, barefoot.

She gets back in the car and fusses at Jack about something.

"You're not his mommy," I say.

"Yes I am!"

"You are, are you? Was he in your belly?"

"Yes. I'm meeried."

"You are? Who are you married to?"

"Evan's my husbin."

"Oh, he is?"

"Mommy, before you meeried daddy he was lost from you," she notes.

"Yes. I was a lost soul before I met your daddy... so let me ask you another question... are you ticklish?"

"No! No, m'am! Give me some space, mommy! I'm going to count. One... two..."

"TICKLE!!!" I yell.

Labels: conversation, Madalyn